I have finally started this blog. Been meaning to start writing something like this for a long time, without the pressures of a readership and pretensions, and with plenty of time at my disposal. And what better time to begin something like this than my bored hours at this internship.
It's a little annoying. Having to make myself creative when this idiot trainee V N is obnoxiously bitching about somebody else kissing a senior associate's ass, but yes, something, without doubt, is better than nothing.
Something I have lamented over previously, over and again several times in my previous attempts at regular blogging - my complete inability to frame sentences and string words together to expressly exactly what I have in mind. I harbour no doubts in mind with regard to my ability to be able to express myself, I have done so before and been received with much adulation.
But, like I have said to myself before, I feel rusty. I need to oil it back to working condition. And I will. This is my final year at college, possibly my last time in Mumbai for a long time to come as well. I am never going to have at my disposal the kind of time I do now, and the kind of opportunities that beckon now. I am constantly storing little snippets of stories or ideas I want so share, but NOTHING ever comes of it. EVER. Argh.
It is liberating not writing for an audience. I have never ever really written for myself, unless you count the emo poetry I used to write as a teen and some of my futile attempts at maintaining a journal. I suppose a handwritten journal just will not work for me because I am such a PC-oriented person. I know from experience that I think and work faster and better when I have the laptop in front of me as against the notebook. So my pretty brown journal must be laid to rest, I suppose. Unless I'm travelling and getting online is a bitch.
I should probably get back to work now. Have some work to finish off before my boss gets here. I'm still undecided as to whether or not I should impress these people and whether or not I want this job. I suppose the personality A in me will never allow me to lose something if I am supposedly competing for it with others, regardless of whether I need it or not. It would be nice to get myself a corporate job, work among these people, make shitloads of money, and blow it up at fancy places during weekend. But, how nice would it be? I am so tired working merely as an intern everyday. My life would just be work, home, and fancy food and wine during weekends. I know for a fact I don't want it, but I need to be in this city. I want to be with J. I need to be with J.
Aaaanyway, I have successfully managed to waste more than two hours at work. I should get back work so that I have something ready when D is back.
Will post soon, oh non-existent reader.
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